If you are reading this, then I am still interested in swapping reviews.

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Hi!  Looking to swap honest reviews! 

The story I am looking to have reviewed is Life Magic, #6445.  It's an elemental fantasy and currently 36 chapters in on RR, 1k works or so each.  

I would be happy to review your work in exchange.  I like Sci Fi and Fantasy most.  Reply below (or message me) if you want to swap - the more the merrier.

Best,

Leo

I'll give it a shot! Though my progress may be a bit slow, since I'm trying to not fall too far behind on my own fiction. Then again, that gives you plenty of time to read it if it looks like it's to your taste.

Friendly Neighborhood Necromancer
Slightly LitRPG, Much fantasy, the tags are fairly accurate.

Looks interesting, I'll check it out! It's a swap then! Should get you feedback in a few days.

I'm going to read yours now and mine is:
http://royalroadl.com/fiction/8489
Thanks in advance ;)

Thanks for your review Alicorna, heading over to yours now.

Still happy to swap reviews with anyone interested!

Reviewed you, Alicorna.  Best of luck as we both continue to improve as storytellers!

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@AdvonKoulthar , finished reading yours and left a review. Took me a few days. While I'm not a huge follower of the genre (video game lit), I liked the tone , and think you have something there.

Best,

Leo

@LeoDuhVinci
Sorry it's taking me so long, I am going to get to it eventually. I'll just give a bit of feedback on what I've read so far(Chapter 14).

For Form, you are definitely excelling. Good grammar, spelling, and word choice. The sentences are concatenated well, whether it be in word choice or idea flow.

As for the Story, it started off strong. It felt a little bit on the cliche side, but you owned it and did it well. The appearance of a wily old master to take in a prodigy, things looked like they would proceed somewhat near the paths that had been traveled before with hints of divergence, and I felt excited to read what came next.
Then whoosh time skip! Other than being abrupt, I got my bearings pretty quickly. So this wasn't about the Jess' time at the magic academy, but working for Cesaro. A few moments later, we then get into the conspiracy.

Conspiracies are great, but I think you may have dropped it in too quickly, even if this does seem to be a prologue more or less. I still don't get Jessica's personality very well at this point, why is Cesaro taking her along? She doesn't seem particularly well trained for the conspiratorial stuff. It felt like a very rushed introduction of a key point later on. (Small thing that may have just been a misplaced line, Chapter 11. C. states some people were on the kill list before they were born, and in the next sentence J asks is they deserved to die from some wrong in the past. Vengeance by proxy is mentioned, but it's odd to read)

Then we switch viewpoints to Cinis, running about easily in the forbidden tunnels. The Chosen One? Perhaps. The flow from Jess' storyline to Cinis was smooth, but it really made me feel like I picked up the first few chapters of another book.

Independently, each bit looks great, and the connections between scenes usually makes sense, but on whole it is a little choppy. I'll get to the rest soon, and see how this judgement holds up in retrospect. The longer it all is, the shorter those stunts in the beginning will seem, and it may make more sense why you did things this way.

I'd like to swap reviews. I need an honest, unbiased review of my fiction "Fighting God". Here's the link: http://royalroadl.com/fiction/8134. There's 43 chapters so far.

Hello LeoDuhVinci,

I too would like to swap reviews. There's a link to my story in my signature. Let me know if you're up to it,

Hello, are there people up for some reviewing ? I'd appreciate a honest opinion on my story, and pointers on what to improve. There's 24 chapters/300-ish pages at the moment.
I'll gladly swap with anyone interested. (but be warned, I don't know much about VR, litrpg and xianxia genres and often don't enjoy it, so I'd be somewhat unhelpful and influenced by my tastes.)
The link: http://royalroadl.com/fiction/10149

'brostigno' pid='821428' dateline='1486851510' Wrote: Hello, are there people up for some reviewing ? I'd appreciate a honest opinion on my story, and pointers on what to improve. There's 24 chapters/300-ish pages at the moment.
I'll gladly swap with anyone interested. (but be warned, I don't know much about VR, litrpg and xianxia genres and often don't enjoy it, so I'd be somewhat unhelpful and influenced by my tastes.)
The link: http://royalroadl.com/fiction/10149

I'll swap reviews with you :)

Anyone willing to swap reviews?