Hi people, penguins, sentient cookie overlords or whatever you are.

I've already written 4 chapters and I think its moving along quite nicely, but I did the same with my last story idea. This is becoming a bit of an issue, I start a story then think of a new idea and write about that instead Dx.

God I'd make an awful husband.

What I need is commitment, I want to stick to an idea and I'd like your help to stick it to me! (awful phrasing sorry)


The story incorporates one of 4 summoned heroes after they defeat a magic program/proxy called the Golem legion. Developed by an ancient civilization using an extremely advanced version of a widespread technique called 'binding' in which something is bound to an object through engraved markings. This can have a number of effects depending on what is bound (which can pretty much be anything) but usually it changes the properties of the original item. (i.e. a stone marked with the sigil of light is used for lamps and torches)

The golem legion can be loosely likened to a fantasy version of skynet from terminator

Some golems also have free will and learn from their experiences. I'm trying to pose the questions, are these golems 'alive'? Would it be murder if I destroy it? Does something have to be alive to have a place where they live, a place they can call home?

But I'm not sure if I can pull off such a deep story xD, so I'll focus on the last question (from above) and add in the other ideas if it helps the story.

Sure some of them are actual programs that formed their own identity but what if some of them actually had an identity bound to them, or worse had someone's soul bound to them?

WELL THATS THE BACKSTORY FEEL FREE TO MAKE A STORY FROM IT IDC. In fact it would be cool to read someone elses take on it so PM me if you do!

The real story is about 20 years after that and is about a lower noble child who is beaten and abused by his parents for being well... for being a general disappointment in all of his classes be it; etiquette, maths, literature, etc.

He later meets up with one of the 4 summoned heroes during a childish bet with other young masters to test his bravery. What he finds is a recluse mage spending the rest of his life trying to find a way home and reunite with his family. (hopefully you'll forget this by the time I upload the story...) The child finds out that his creativity actually gives him a talent for magic and binding, it's also the reason why he's awful at linear problems like math.

The hero records all of his experiences in a journal which is an important plot point, I plan to explore the backstory through this (in past tense, hero's perspective, along with his bias)

The story focuses on the concept of 'home'. Is it a place that we live in? Is it the place we feel most comfortable in? Are we home because we say we are? Is home even a physical place? Maybe home is a place in our a minds, a fantasy world created by our own thoughts.

Again I'm not sure I can pull it off but I want try because I love the worlds people make and I want to make my own, a fantasy world I can call home (haha, wow that sounds tacky on paper). Unfortunately I live on Earth (curse reality) and that's a fact but its about time I put pen to paper, or stylus to touch screen... or fingers to keyboard... or whatever.


Any ideas are welcome but an honest opinion on the concept would be nice.

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Looking around this section of the forum.... I feel like I took a wrong turn somewhere this IS in the right section right...?

This is indeed the right section for this story. Though I know from writing this style of story that it won't work. I've written a story where the protagonist(MC) is around after a bunch of major events and reads about them in journals. The problem is that the readers lose interest in your current story and want to read about the other story recorded within the journals.

My advice is to instead create two separate fictions of both the golem wars and the aftermath with the kid. Keeping some things secret to try and keep the fact that the two fictions are connected under wraps as long as possible.

I love the concept. If you can manage to pull it off, this will become the best story ever. An abused child that actually has a hidden talent is an a bit overused theme, but there's little new nowadays in character backstory. Most has been done dozens of times already.

However, looking at a hero who's already saved the world and just wants to go back home, that sounds amazing. I haven't read other fictions here, but in real novels I hadn't encountered this theme and it sounds great. In my mind I can already see a desperate man at his table, looking through mountains of papers, writing annotations and notes all day long and with a candle when its gone for years. But time passes and he still doesn't find a way out. He then sits at his table, hunched over all his books and papers, looking at the world outside without really seeing it. He had wasted all his years searching for a way back, not living it and now when there's little time, he knows it's too late. He would never see his home again. This realization comes crashing down on him like an avalanche, swallowing him and a single tear slides down his cheek. It is all over.

That's a nice picture, I might actually want to read this kind of story. I know it is set from the boy's perspective but it would be very interesting to see his journey as he reads through the mage's journal, seeing how a prideful youth full of adventure saves the world, learns and then turns bitter, angry as he finds no way to return home. Such a sad story there.

Edit: To what the other person said. It is very true. It is one of the biggest dangers of writing like that. That's why I like the approach Brandon Sanderson went for in his Misborn trilogy. There before every chapter there was a short paragraph from an old journal, a heroes story of old, which at first glance had little to do with the chapter but was very interesting while not overshadowing the main story itself. (In the end everything was connected of course, but at the time it felt like those excepts had little to do with  the story. 

The point Dark Sun put out is exactly what I'm going for. It's the whole reason for the journal but as vocaloid has stated this is a dangerous idea... however don't worry its pretty easy to spoil but there are plenty of world shaking events planned. Sometimes an accident doesn't look like one to the world hehe.

Unfortunately I can't go with your suggestion vocaloid as good as it is, the journal itself is an important plot point and I can't take it out from the core story.

It is shot from the boys perspective (sorry for not directly saying it) but also takes POV from other characters.
POVs from the mage, obviously from the child and perhaps from a golem...?

The POVs serve to show extremely varied views on what a family is and what home is which is heavily linked to the origin of each character.

The mage doesn't like others reading that journal either, how'd you feel if someone found your pink diary with all your dirty secrets and corny one liners then posted it on facebook?

Childish innocence plays a further role in driving a 'dagger' further into the poor old guys heart.
Writing that scene right now actually and I'm having a blast.

Ahahaha god I'm so evil who said 'sticks and stones can break my bones but words will never hurt me', the words weren't even supposed to hurt him but it'll probably cause the most pain imaginable.

The story itself is not centred around power like most other stories on RR, at least for now. If anything it would be how that power is used and why.

Really interesting and I would love to read it so make sure to add a link to it if you made it on this site. I think it is fine if we are interested also in the past story. It would be fine to show it when contents of the diary help with present events or when the Mage is looking back. These glimpses can help forshadow future events or even give us insight into what is happening in the present. Kind of giving us parallel stories both happening in the same book but recorded by the inhabitants as 'history'. It could really add a lot of depth and interest.

As for the concept of home and family. I like that. I've always liked those kind of concepts that leave a warm feeling in your heart by the end of the story.
Like someone searching for a home and in the end realizing it could be anywhere as long as you were with the right people.
Someone adopted or abandoned finding that 'family' doesn't have to mean blood ties but that love can be a stronger bond than simply blood.
The underlying principle that true love is a powerful force that can overcome any darkness.
These are great themes if done right and can leave people crying and laughing and sighing in happiness. These are the kind of stories that linger in your mind, if done right.

Very interesting.

A few details you should flesh out:

- Why weren't the summoned heroes dismissed after they accomplished their tasks? If they were, what went wrong with the mage's dismissal? If they weren't, what happened to the other 3 heroes?
- Are summoned heroes immortal? Are they actually summoned from another universe? If they are, how does time pass in the other universe? (i.e. is the hero's family already dead and gone?)
- What is it about binding that requires creativity? If it is accomplished through rune combinations, it sounds like the logical precision of mathematics would result in success. Does your MC discover new runes or rediscover lost runes?
- Do you have any other major characters? It sounds like the hero is trying to go home, but also like your MC is looking for a place to belong, and a family to belong to.
- What role does binding play in society? Has it been abandoned after the golem legion was defeated? Is it a common part of technology, used in almost everything, like lamps and furniture? Is it a rare and useful thing that only the nobility have access to? If it's a valuable skill, why wasn't the MC's talent for binding discovered before he met the hero?

Hope the questions help you create your story.

Sustaining the energy to write a story to the end is quite difficult, in my experience. However, if you get the urge to start writing another story, it doesn't mean the first one has failed. You can always work on two stories at the same time; I personally find that alternating between universes helps my creativity when I'm blocked.

Hmm... good questions, yes I know you are implying I ask myself but making a post is fun since I like talking about the mythos I created.

I do want to keep a couple secrets for the sake of the story when I post it eventually, and I will.

First off there is no form of 'dismissal' there never was. Its explained early on in the story but summoning is an extremely advanced experimental technique, a result of combining the schools of magic with the dangerous art of high order binding. It was intended to summon suitable champions from the same world, a sort of instant locater and transporter; something employers nowadays would envy. Scientists had no idea and hence no way of knowing that there were other dimensions.

One of the other 3 heroes actually comes from their moon Zur'Bulan (the pale lady) which as it turns out is habitable. Though that person isn't aware that the reason they are so fixated on the moon is because of their origin. What happened to each hero, or were they come from is not something I'm willing to divulge as its pretty central to the story.

Summoned heroes are definitely not immortal, they are selected merely on their talents, intelligence and capacity to learn. Life is finite but magic of the restoration school and taboo high order binding techniques do have ways around this though the results have been known to be quite ugly

The passage of time I'd say is consistent but when it comes to jumping between universes it gets loopy and confusing I'd prefer to avoid this if possible but it does give me quite a lot of plot leeway. Systems for time travel and the like are extremely hard to make, at least for me and as things stand it can easily overcomplicate the story.

The talent here actually refers to discovering loop holes and new techniques not the actual 'learning the first time I see it thing', in this regard the 'child' MC here discovers and invents though its not like he'll never rediscover and reinvent as well. I misused the word talent earlier, my mistake. (creativity being thinking outside the box)

Binding isn't as simple as I made it out to be earlier, field binding, runes, enchantments, mythic text and a couple more...
Low-mid-high order refers to their intensity.

Runes themselves are basic, runes don't react to each other unless 'tethered', and thank merciful god for that otherwise nation altering calamities would be as frequent as a rainy day in England. Tethered runes form what is known as mythic text which can greatly alter their effects to the point messing with them is so dangerous researchers have to put their life on the line to experiment with them.


It's the main reason why precursor knowledge carries so much weight, and also why its so controversial especially with the common folk.

"It sounds like the hero is trying to go home, but also like your MC is looking for a place to belong, and a family to belong to" Couldn't have said it better myself.

Now the final question is my favourite as it goes hand in hand with the world's setting. The era of this world of mine is the fantasy equivalent of the industrial revolution. I stray away from guns under the notion of magic and binding taking its place, it isn't necessary to the world so it was never invented but I digress. The art of binding's main issue is its instability though the bigger problem is the lack of credible first hand information. The question of pricing takes a few too many words to explain but it relates to the above, though in most cases its a luxury.

Binding is far more efficient and more powerful than spells but also far more mysterious. The schools of magic are currently more useful and far more widespread.

Thanks a lot for the questions, gave me heaps of ideas outside of the things I mentioned. Too many ideas in fact, should probably store it on a note pad and lock it in a vault rather than stuff it all into my story. I attempt to avoid info dumps like this one, but for brainstorming it was useful.

Haha, you're welcome. Very interesting, and the fact that you have answers to all the questions means you know your story very well. Good luck, and feel free to sign up for my mentor course if you'd like me to ask more questions! (It's not a real course; just PM me lol.)

Nirb, important point here: What's the name of you story so i can find it and read it?

Haha thanks, when I wrap up the first volume and I'm happy with it I will probably make a poll for it.

Honestly, that's the hardest question to answer...

I'm having some difficulty thinking up a nice name that encapsulates the world and can draw in readers, if you have some suggestions that would be great

'Homeless' was one of my ideas but it doesn't really stand out. Maybe 'Sherlock Homeless'.... no, maybe not.
'A quest of worlds', 'The Magi's memoir', 'Traveller's Pathway' (that's a plot point so maybe not...) 'Mundus Mysterium' (if I want to go all Latin)

Yeah I'm having some difficulty

I'd go with something overly dramatic like Magic Chains or Homeless Hero.

This are both just examples, and don't fully capture the flavour (as I perceive it) of your story. I'll think about it more later.

Over dramatising it, I didn't really think of that out of fear of 'cheesiness' but I'll try thinking of some titles along that line of thinking

Though I probably wont go with 'Homeless Hero' as the main focus isn't the hero but rather his goal/desire. Something that is sort of a mutual feeling with other characters such as the MC who isn't a hero.

'Magic Chains' is interesting, I assume the line of thought here being confined or bound. Huh, bound...

'Boundless Legends' or 'Homebound' perhaps?

Or how about 'Lost and Bound' instead of 'Lost and Found' haha.

'Homebound' seems a little plain but as it stands I'm leaning towards that.  

Sigh... At least this isn't an issue for character names and locations, believe I'd be nigh on screwed if that were the case.

Haha, I've found that you can go totally cheesy in your writing as long as you pretend you don't realize how cheesy it is, and it will come across as sincere (as long as you don't read your own story aloud). Got A's in all my high school essays from this trick.

Yeah, I wanted to invoke the binding element, but "bound" is kind of a not-very-dramatic word.

No puns, lol, unless you're doing comedy.

Mm, I still can't think of a proper title for your story. For the record, I'm pretty bad at naming things unless I'm allowed using puns.

With the help of my trusty thesaurus.com, I have come to the opinion that you should use the word "sundered" in your title. It's pretty high on the overly-dramatic scale, and describes how the hero was forcibly ripped from his home.

Honestly I couldn't think of a way to use sunder properly in a title.

Reading over bits of my story I thought to title it 'The Arcanium Revolution' in light of the worlds setting.

Though 'The innocent mage and the dastardly summoners' sounded cool as well.

Also the story isn't limited to the hero and his old family, on the contrary it focuses primarily on the child creating a new family.

My main reason to avoid making the story focus on the hero is actually his motive. Though powerful it can easily neglect or turn the world and magic/binding system I painstakingly created insipid. Eh~ Call me selfish I guess.

I like The Arcanum Revolution.

I know I wrote what I wrote about cheesiness, but there's no un-cheesy way to use "dastardly", hahaha.

How about 'Tale Torn Asunder' if we are going to use 'sundered' as a verb?

It is a bit focused on the fact that it averts the usual 'be summoned, save the world, go home' trope. Like how the perfect fairytale is made, with heroes and heroines and world-saving adventures, only for the story to be ripped apart by the sudden reality of the situation of being unable to ever go back home.

Though, then again the title I made for my own story sucks, so you can just ignore this if you want to.